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I’m a selfish best friend

Disclaimer: this is my pity party. I am writing this the same day that I received the news. This will be published days after the news was broke to me. I know this makes me sound incredibly selfish and not a very good best friend at all but this is how I honestly feel. This is me being real with my initial feelings about this. Will I always feel like this? No. Will it take time? Yes. (This was written on 11/24/14). 

 

My mind is all over the place, my heart is broken, there’s a constant lump in my throat, and tears ready to run down my face at any given moment.

^ This is how I’ve been feeling all day today since this morning when my best friend told me that she was moving. I feel like kicking and screaming and demanding that she isn’t allowed to do this to me.

I’ve always had friends. I don’t ever remember a time that I didn’t have friends. Friends come and go. Some stay for awhile and some are gone as fast as they developed. Some make us stronger, some make smarter, and some make us better. I’ve had all kinds of friends. I’ve had great friends and I’ve had friends that have stabbed me in the back. I have a few friends that I call real friends. A few that are best friends. And even fewer friends that I call family. This girl is family.

I’ve  only met this friend a little over a year ago. I didn’t even know she existed until September (maybe) of 2013. We’ve grown close fast and I wouldn’t trade any of what I’ve been through with her…..even if it meant she wouldn’t move. I feel like a little girl who’s friend is moving and they just cry and cry.

I was so shocked when I read the Facebook message from her. At first I wondered why she didn’t tell me in person but on the other hand I was glad she didn’t because I probably would have started crying. And not the pretty cry either, the dreaded ugly cry. As thrilled as I am for her & her family (and I truly am), I would like nothing better than if everything just fell apart & they ended up staying here. I know that is incredible selfish of me. I know that no best friend really wants this to happen. I know that this is part of Gods plan for them. I know that I want the best for the her (and her family), even if that means I can’t be apart of her daily life anymore.

There was so much that I was looking forward to doing with her and her new born daughter. Our girls are only 4 months apart. I thought we were going to raise them together. I thought they’d grow up together and be bffs. I am now having to put my wants aside and plan new things.

(I know all this may sound pathetic to some that I am this upset about my friend moving but there are those few friends who mean so much more than just another friend.)

She’s only moving two hours away, so day visits aren’t out of the question. I would get to visit a city that I’ve never been to. Those are the only positives that I can find right now. Plus, I’m the only one here that knows she’s moving. I can’t even have a pity party with our other friends about this! It’s going to happen so quickly too. They are planning on being moved and settled into their new lives by the first of the year. I won’t have time to process much of this by the time she gone.

And my 2 year old. My 2 year old daughter absolutely loves her. Tells me she wants her all the time. The smile and happiness that spreads all over her face when she sees her Gigi is irreplaceable. I hope she takes this news better than I am. Plus side is, again, she’s only two hours away.

Im still trying to process what I was told, the time in which it’s happening, and the fact that she won’t be here anymore. Why now? Why this fast?

I have other friends and best friends here in this town & I don’t want any of them moving and would be just has upset if they told me this news. I thought our circle would be here forever and we’d raise our kiddos together and be old before our circle was broken up. I am just so sad. But I know these plans aren’t mine and they aren’t even hers, they are His and they are perfect.

I will miss you so much friend.

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Exciting news!

Since 2010 I know that I have been wanting to move to Texas to be closer to my mom. Her and my step dad own a few businesses that they are starting up & remodeling & all that good stuff. (They have been working years on this & cannot wait to see it finished!)
Anywho, Mister (what I call my husband) wasn’t very keen on the idea at all when I first brought it up to him. I did explain to him why I wanted to move and how I thought it would benefit all of us from doing so. He thought about it for quite some time before he agreed with me. He had a few different reasons why he thought it was a good idea, but we eventually got on the same page. In early 2010 we started looking into the area and contacting people from the city we were looking into to get some insight & information. We didn’t have th ability to get on a plane and check out the area ourselves.
We had a plan & move date in mind when we started planning this big move (we were in NC at the time). Well for whatever reason this move was placed on the back burner….I think something called life got in the way.

Then we were faced with a huge decision right before the summer of 2011. It was either stay where we were & be in the same situation we were in OR pack up and move to TX. My husband made the choice right then and there to pack up and move to TX. As excited as I was, I was very nervous….the distance & lack of planning was very intimidating to me. But I trusted Mister and backed him up 200%. I know that he was trying to do what was best for the 6 of us and that he wasn’t going to let anyone\anything get in his way of that.

So we have been in TX since July of 2011. Things are falling into place slowly but surely. Even though from the outside things might not seem like they have changed….they most certainly have! But this is not my exciting news!

Now I cannot go into a lot of detail out of respect to my mom and step dad, but they are going to finally be moving to where we are & where they are working on their businesses! They were supposed to down here a looong time ago but again with that thing called life, things didn’t pan out the way they had planned. But they will be down here sometime this month…mostly likely towards the very end of May! I am super excited!!!! Even Mister is happy and excited about this! We haven’t told the kiddos and probably won’t until it gets closer just so we don’t have to explain that it’s not time yet. And if you have kids….then you know that telling them something too far in advance isn’t the best thing you can do for yourself 😉

Anyway, that’s my exciting news for right now! I couldn’t be happier for them because I know this is something that they have been working so hard for this for such a long time.

Yay for great news!
Do you have any news that you would like to share? If so, we would all love to hear about it!

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Sorry for being MIA

Hello fans & readers 🙂

I have not been a very good blogger lately and I am sorry. Ever since we have moved to TX things have been crazy & it never seems to stop. Between settling in, finding we are expecting again, two kids in school, husband working all the time, a family member coming to live with us, extra activities with our two oldest…..the list is never ending! I know that a lot of you know how this goes & can relate to me on this.

I have had tons that I have wanted to talk about & post about. I have wanted to share things with you all. I am seriously going to try to get better and get back in the swing of things.

I still have reviews\giveaways to host, along with sending out prizes to the winners from the last giveaway. I know that I am very behind on things and I am sorry for that.

I am so thankful that I have fans & readers that are understanding and willing to work with me and wait on my slow butt 😉

I am still alive and just wanted to update and say that I am sorry for the things that I haven’t done. I in no way expected to slack on the blog at all. I really enjoy writing & hearing you all have to say in response.

Love you all 🙂

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Moving in

Hello fans! I know that I have been MIA for awhile but it’s been pretty stressful for me these last 2 weeks or so. This week we will be moving everything into our new place. So that means that I won’t be around to do any posts 😦

I am also not sure when we will have the internet up and running at our new place. I will try and keep everyone up to date on the fan page as best I can. We aren’t sure who we are choosing as our internet provider either….so it will take awhile to figure that out.

But in the mean time, I hope that you all will have the best days!

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Reality Check

I am having a really hard time right now.
This moving process is taking so much longer than anyone expected & the stress that is coming along with it is so much that I feel that I could snap at any moment….and actually have a few times. I am so ready for all of this to done & over with and, finally, get a normal life back…whatever that means.

I think that I made a fantasy land in my head before we started the actual road trip. I had imagined this whole thing playing out & now, it’s nothing like what I thought it would be. I am disappointed & having some depression for it. I feel like I set myself up for all this because I was the one with these thoughts about moving.

I thought our whole entire life would change with this move. I thought all the bad & negative things would leave us behind once we crossed the state line. I thought life would be easier here. I thought we would be ahead instead of behind. I, apparently, thought we would be living in a fairy tale.
I know why I thought all these things but it didn’t hit me that life wasn’t going to turn out like that until recently. I wasn’t aware that my mind has actually believed this new idea about what life was going to be. I didn’t know that my mind had embedded this idea into my brain.

Now, I did think that things would be different in a good way & in some aspects they are. In all the other ways though, it’s just the same. I thought that moving here, my entire mind set would change….instantly. I am in no way saying that I regret moving here or wish that we hadn’t moved here. I really like it here & am glad that we have moved here. What I am saying is that I think I phsyed myself up so many  about the new life that we would have out here that I lost touch with reality. I didn’t go crazy over here, though some days it feels like I have, but I did lose touch with what would really happen when moving here. I am 100% positive that this would have happened no matter where we moved to.

I had all these great expectations about moving here. I had this plan of what would happen once we moved here. I had a vision of how our new life would be. I had dreamed about what life would be here.
None of this mattered though because life has hit me upside the head with reality. I am not sure how to work through this. I know what life is really like & what to expect but I don’t think that my mind has caught up with all this. I think that because I wanted things to be so different that it’s going to be really hard to get this fantasy land out of my mind. Not saying that we cannot be there one day but I know that it wasn’t going to happen overnight or within a few days of being here.

I am really not as out of touch with reality has this may make me sound. I think that I just wanted something so badly that I forgot to factor in what would have really happened…..and has. I think that once we are out of a hotel and into our own place, things will be easier to deal with. I can’t be for sure though & will only know once we get there and start this new life. These last (almost) 2 months have really kicked my butt & added extra stress. I am grateful for some of the things that we went through to get to this point….but some, if not most, of the things that we have gone through
could have been left out.

I would like to take a moment & thank our family for helping us out through these last 2 months when they didn’t have to. I know that it has been a drain on you & I am truly sorry for that. You will be paid back. Thank you again to all our family that helped out….we love you very much. I know saying ‘Thank you’ isn’t enough but your help has meant more than we can express. Thank you ❤

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Not just for jelly

 

As we started our move to Texas almost a month ago we made a pit stop in Hickory NC to have some lunch. We didn’t want to stop and go into a restaurant because we were already behind schedule. We just stopped, fixed some PB & Js, and then headed out again.

There was one small problem……we didn’t have a knife.

Pulled into a gas station thinking that my husband would just get a plastic knife. Nope, he cam back with this knife that not only I had never seen but never heard of either! I just kept looking at this knife trying to figure out how this was any more special than a regular knife. I didn’t realize the awesomeness of the knife until I was getting the near the bottom of the jar. This knife is so great for getting the contents out of the jar!

But it’s not just for jelly and peanut butter! No way! This knife could be used for mayo jars, honey jars, bbq jars…..just about any jar that you can think of! Cleans up very easily & dries even quicker! It’s bendy (lack of a better word) so it will definitely take some strength to break this thing. I believe that every person should have this knife! And for the price, there is no reason why you shouldn’t buy one!

Stop by their website & check out all the other products they offer at great prices. You are sure to find something there that you need\want!

Will be hosting a giveaway VERY soon for this jelly knife! Just waiting for the package to get here!

*I bought this product & then contacted the company with how much I really liked their product. All opinions are my own & have no been compensated for said opinions.*

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I don’t like to wait….but I will

I am not going to get details or names in this post.

We are staying in a hotel…someone was able to get us a good rate. The hotel is a fairly high end one.

We have been very disappointed in this hotel since we arrived but for certain reasons it’s not up to us where we stay.

I stated on fb last night that I was going to talk to the gm (general manager) today because something that happened last night was the last straw.

Was told this morning that talking to the gm wouldn’t be a good idea because it could put the person who is helping us job on the line.

Now I feel stuck. Though I do not want to have this person lose their job, I don’t think it’s ok for me to just sit here and say nothing to the manager about how this hotel is being run.

Also, I am very thankful for the help that we have had during this move…do not mistake that at all. If it weren’t for all the help that we have had from people….we wouldn’t be where we are now.
Now with that being said, I don’t think it’s smart to help someone out by placing your job in jeopardy if someone where to find out you were helping. That sounds like a very dumb thing to do. I didn’t know that by accepting this help would be putting this persons job in jeopardy if it leaked that this person helped us.

So what I am thinking of doing is this. Wait until we leave this hotel and then write a letter (no names) to the gm & let him\her know what our experience was with this hotel. That way I am not further putting this persons job on the line & my voice is heard.
This is the best solution that I can think of. I am not that happy about waiting because if this stuff is happening to us then I am sure it’s happening to other guests here. The adult in me will wait though.

Once I write the letter I will update and let you know what the hotel had to say in return. Again, very disappointed in this hotel…..expect much more out of the it then we are getting.

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Craving

In about 20 days, it has been 2 months since my family has had our own space. And it hasn’t hit me until about the last week or so. Since it just hit me, I guess it isn’t to the point where I am going crazy…yet!

There are certain things that I am craving over others.
I think the main thing that I am craving is my own space. I don’t think I have been gone this long without having my own space…..my own ‘timeout’ area. I don’t have my own bed, my own dresser, my own pillow, and blankets. Don’t get me wrong- I am thankful that we have a hotel to stay in….but it’s not mine.
The next thing that I am craving would have to be a home cooked meal. We aren’t going hungry over here, but we have cut back on the amount we would normally eat just because of space & nothing to cook anything in. (This hotel has no microwave or fridge) I cannot wait to get into our own place, get behind the stove, and make some food! I would have never thought I would say that…..but dang, I am tired of eating what we are!
And I think the 3rd thing I am missing the most is being able to do laundry & clean when and how I want. I have 4 kids so when they eat there is always a mess to clean up. I do not like the fact that I cannot just go to the closet, grab the vacuum, and clean it up. As well as the cooking thing…I would have never thought that I would want to clean.

I think most of you will be able to see where I am coming from with all this. I am not in any way being ungrateful for the things that we do have. It’s just that I cannot wait until we have our own space, kitchen, and cleaning supplies. I don’t think I will take any of that for granted ever again! I am done with camping & hotel living for awhile!

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My first….

Bad review ever! I have never planned on writing a bad one, but I cannot keep this one to myself.

We have been staying a many hotels on our move from NC to TX. Some are more luxurious than others, but all have been great! Not one compliant about any of them….until we arrived at the current one we are staying in.

When you first walk into this hotel your first impression is wow, this is a great up scale hotel! I didn’t really notice anything until later on our first day\night here. We spent hours at the hotel the first night & when we were finished swimming and wanted to dry off we went to get a few pool towels….they weren’t any ready. I went to the front desk to ask for some & they said the towels were drying. Ok, not a problem, we can wait alittle bit. A few hours later there were still no pool towels. We didn’t want to wait anymore, so we just went upstairs. My 2 oldest boys were getting ready for the shower & I was getting their pjs and towels ready. Come to find out there were no room towels at all in the room! Called the front desk to have some brought up to us & it took at least 45 minutes to get 2 towels! In the room my husband, me, and our 2 youngest are staying in there were also no room towels or wash clothes. One of the beds didn’t have a bottom skirt on it (2 beds in the room). The next day we went back to the pool so the kids could burn some energy. Went to the bathroom (in the pool area) and noticed that the same trash was sitting there from the night before….they hadn’t cleaned the bathrooms! Fire ants were all on one side (I have a child who is highly allergic to them). Went and told the front desk. About 10 minutes later someone from housekeeping came in, sprayed something, said their maintenance people weren’t here today, and if worst comes to worst just have him wear shoes….really?! Like shoes will keep away fire ants. I went over to the side of the pool to tell my husband something and noticed that it looked like pieces were coming off the pool. My husband dived down and brought up pieces of the bottom of the pool! And there is no fridge or microwave in the rooms.

All in all I am completely disappointed in this hotel! I am going to complain to management about this but will do so at the end of our stay here. In doing this I am not trying to be mean or a high maintain guest….just wanting to make them aware of the conditions of their hotel. Not sure if it will make a difference in the way they run this place or not….but at least I know that I did my part and said something. After I speak with someone & depending on how they handle it…..I will then make the choice to say which hotel & the location. That is something that is still up in the air right now.