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For the love, stop saying sorry!

This may be a short rant or a long drawn out thing…ya just never know with me!

We, moms & women, need to stop saying sorry all the time. I cannot count how many times a picture is posted and the first few words are

Sorry for my non-make up face. 

Sorry for the clothes in the background. 

Sorry for my messy hair. 

Sorry for my kids fave being messy. 

Sorry for this. 

Sorry for that.

Stop saying sorry! No one would’ve even noticed those things of you wouldn’t have brought them up yourself. And even if they did, who cares. Why are we apologizing for these things?! 

Are we really sorry for these things? Do we think there is a certain way we/our kids/our house/our car has to look in order to share a milestone or event or just a cute kiddo face?! 

Why is it that a friend cannot come over to your house without you feeling the need to apologize for the way your house looks?! I mean, you have kids for crying out loud! I’m not coming over to your house to inspect it….I’m coming over to spend time with you. 

Same applies with your car. Who cares?! 

I am so fend up with hearing sorry come from women’s mouths when it’s not even something to be sorry about. 

sor-ry [sor’ē] adjective, feeling pity or sorrow, regret

A Students Dictionary, Dictionary Projext Inc. 

Please tell me why you are feeling pity about these things? What do you regret? 

For the love, shut up & stop saying sorry! 

You have nothing to be sorry about when you allow your natural beauty to show rather than a made up version for yourself. 

You have nothing to be sorry about when you allow your kiddos to play all around your house. 

You have nothing to be sorry about when you throw your hair in a messy bun rather than making sure every hair is in its place. 

You have nothing to be sorry about when you allow others to see the real you rather than what you think society wants to see. If you have a friend or family member who cannot understand this, then please, kick them to the curb. If they are that insecure for you about your life, can you imagine how doubly insecure they are about their own life?! Not enough popcorn for all that drama! 

Embrace yourself and life. There’s nothing wrong with letting things be messy or real or raw. Do not aplogize for living your life and putting the important things first. 

Love the mess and those who help make it! 

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Lamp & Light

I follow a lady named Kristin Schmucker on instagram. Towards the end of October she announced that she was hosting a photo challenge for the month of November & I decided to jump on that and participate.

lamplight

I did get days behind and then had to play catch up but I am happy to report that I actually did all 30 days! I usually start these things and then finish them….go me!!

I was going to share the pictures from instagram to facebook but then I thought that I would just put them all here & add the description that I wrote along with it.
I don’t really know why I choose to share this way but oh well, I did!

My tattered bible along with the current bible study I’m doing.#lampandlight #day1 #imbehind#playcatchup #novemberphotochallenge#bible @kristinschmucker#kristinschmucker

Reminds me to always know that the bad that happens is to bring Him glory!#lampandlight #novemberphotochallenge#day2 #genesis50:20 #playcatchup#imbehind #favoritebibleverse@kristinschmucker #kristinschmucker

One of my favorite mugs. Given to me by a great friend as a Christmas present. Every time I use it I think of her and all the fun we have together!#novemberphotochallenge #lampandlight#day3 #mugshot @kristinschmucker#kristinschmucker

My Bible study spot…..where I’m comfortable and snuggly & if I fall asleep while studying (which happens often), I don’t have to get up and move! 😜
#lampandlight #biblestudyspot #day4#novemberphotochallenge@kristinschmucker #kristinschmucker

I have many goals that I’d like to accomplish in my life. At the end of the day I know none of that matters if I’m still the old me. It’ll take time but I know that my ultimate goal is to be a better me than I was yesterday.
#lampandlight #day5 #playingcatchup#goals

The book of Proverbs is an instructional manual in my opinion. It can tell how you act and what to say. So much wisdom is within those pages.
#lampandlight #day6 #playingcatchup#day6 #proverbs #bookinthebible

As much as they drive me questions and even question I was given an army of mini me’s, these little people have made my world better. They have taught me so much and made me step out of my comfort zone to give them a better life. I love them and they certainly my small blessings.
#lampandlight #day7 #playingcatchup#smallblessings #mykiddos

A prayer in my bible from a few years ago. #lampandlight #day8#playingcatchup #anoteinyourbibe #prayer

This is one of my favorite quotes. My dad used to say this all the time when I was growing up and it’s so true.
#lampandlight #favoritequote#playingcatchup #day9

This has been something that’s been laid upon my heart for at least 6 months, if not more. It’s something I’m praying about and asking God to tell me where and how I should do this.
#lampandlight #onyourheart#playingcatchup #day10 #titus2:3-4

This journal is one of my favorite things. A great friend gave it to me and it’s a place where I can create and draw out the Word when it touches me.
#lampandlight #afavoritething#playingcatchup #day11 #biblejournal#create #givenbyafriend

I know that I’m given grace ever second of my day but to be able to wake up every morning and start from a clean slate is the biggest sign of grace to me.
#lampandlight #areminderofgrace#playingcatchup #day12 #sunrise #grace

There are too many to list but this seems to be one of the biggest prayer requests I have right now. A house. One that will fit us more comfortably than the one we are currently in. One that we can call home.
#lampandlight #day13 #caughtup#aprayerrequest #aplacetocallhome

“We bring the kingdom come” We Christ followers are the ones who bring the kingdom to others on a daily basis. Not only do I love this lyric but I love this song!
#lampandlight #day14 #favoritelyric#webringthekingdomcome #jasongray#witheveryactoflove

A dream would be for Mister to be a stay at home dad with me.
#lampandlight #day15 #dream#stayathomedad #stayathomeparents#freedom #timeandmoney

My memory today is my grandparents on my moms side. I miss them much and it saddens me to no end at what they are missing out on. I’d give almost anything to have them back!
#lampandlight #memory #grandparents#wishtheywerestillhere #mcgrew#missthem #lovethem

 These two things are always on my to do list. There are others but laundry & dishes take most of my time.
#lampandlight #playingcatchup #day17#todolist


 I love her story and think she is a great example of what you do doesn’t define you & anyone can change.
#lampandlight #characterinthebible #day18#rahab

Nature can give us signs of life & death but has a way of making it look so beautiful. It’s almost thanksgiving and though most trees are turning and leaves are falling, they still are so green! And that blue sky….I just love me a Texas clear blue sky!
#lampandlight #day20 #nature #texassky#fall #trees #lifeanddeath #beautiful

When I study scripture or just read my Bible, I have my purple pen, Bible, and my journal. I never know when a verse will hit me and I want to be ready to journal it.
#lampandlight #playingcatchup #day21#howistudyscripture

I have to be honest and say that I haven’t read Psalms enough to have a favorite verse from this book. Think I know what book I’ll be reading next!
#lampandlight #playingcatchup #day22#favoritepsalms #bookofpsalms


This is a book that helped me to be involved where I feel led/called to be involved in. I’ve cut out the ‘extras’ and just concentrating on my calling.
#lampandlight #playingcatchup #day23#abook #calling #thebestyes#lysaterkeurst


  This word is one that I’ve taken to heart over these last few months to a year & a half. My joy cannot and will it be stolen by anyone or any situation that life throws me. I choose joy. Bad things can happen but my joy still remains.
#lampandlight #playingcatchup #day24#joy #cantstealmyjoy #ichoosejoy

This will always be home to me. I’ve lived in many places but Virginia will always have a special place in my heart.
#lampandlight #day25 #myhome #virginia#specialplaceinmyheart


  
Me! You! We are all attributes of God. We are made in His image!
#lampandlight #playingcatchup #day27#anattributeofgod #me #you#madeinhisimage
  This is so true and definitely something I’m thankful for!
#lampandlight #playingcatchup #day26#whatimthankfulfor #friends #family

   We are mixed up, crazy, tired, annoying, real, and all of this equals a beautiful mess.
#lampandlight #playingcatchup #day28#abeautifulmess #welkerfamily #family#welkerkiddos #welker


  It took awhile to figure out how we were going to announce that we were expecting baby number 6 but I love how this turned out. Things can change with one step (literally & figuratively) and our step was adding two more feet to our family.
#lampandlight #playingcatchup #day29#aphotoilove
PS- just want to say that I am NOT pregnant. I tried to word it so it explained a previous pregnancy announcement but it didn’t come across that way.
I’ve been saying this for as long as I can remember & it’s so true.
#lampandlight #day30 #wordstoliveby

 

There is my 30 day photo challenge! Hope you enjoyed it…..let me know if you did this one too! Now onto my December challange!!!<<<<Let me know if you will do this one with me!

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Rekindling friendships 

Life is funny sometimes….well all the time if we really look at things and how it all turns out. 
We find people we click with and want to do life with them. Those relationships either continue or are broken for whatever reason. Usually when they are broken, they stay broken. Too many times it’s over something so trivial and neither party wants to swallow that hard pill….pride. Pride is not our friend y’all! 

Sometimes those relationships are broken for good reasons and they should stay broken. 
Whatever the reason your relationship is broken, really look at the problem and be honest about it with yourself. It’s so much easier to hold a grudge than it is to mend that tear in the fabric of our friendships. 

In reality, that’s not what we are called to do. We aren’t told to hold grudges or leave things messy. 

We are first and foremost called to forgive. Forgiveness isn’t for the other person, believe me when I say, it’s for ourselves. Forgiveness allows the weight of the issue to leave your shoulders and you feel 100 pounds lighter. I know this is hard and takes time but it’s something we have to do. Holding onto unforgiveness is ugly and messy….no one wants that. (Matthew 4:16)
When you lose a friend and there’s an opportunity to heal and restart, take a moment and ask yourself (and put yourself in their shoes) if it’s something you can move past. Most of the time it is. People will do is wrong, lie, cheat, steal, and hurt us to the core. That is no excuse to not forgive. Pray about your particular situation and listen for your answer. Sometimes we have to do what we’re supposed to do instead of what we want in order to be obedient to Him. 
Proverbs 17:17

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Closing chapters in our lives

Closing chapters in our lives are hard. Whether it be a job, friends, volunteering, or even family…closing those doors aren’t always something you want to do. Sometimes we have to close those doors in order to be a better us. Closing those doors could even equal us living a better life. Reducing stress, cutting the negative out, or maybe a bad influence. 
I personally feel that we should tell the person how you feel and not just cut the cord with no explanation. And then there are times that it’s just best to cut that cord. Talking to this person/people won’t make your choice better and could even make things worse. You have to pick which battle you are willing to fight in. 
Whatever door you are closing for whatever reason, we need to be asking God to give us peace with this choice. If this door is meant to be closed rather than closed because that’s just what we want, He’ll close it. We are not to force things to happen just because that’s what we want or because that’s what feels good in the moment. God is bigger than us and His plan is better than ours. 
Let’s step back for a moment (or two or ten) and wait on Him to give us the directions and actions we should do. Doing the opposite of His will for us will not just hurt us but also those around us. 
Pray. Wait. Listen. Praise.

Written on 10/21/15

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It could happen to any of us

I had a topic about closing chapters in your life that I was going to talk about tonight. Something happened today that I think needs to be talked about more. 
Our kiddos. We all have those moments/days where we want to pull our hair out because we just cannot make it one more minute with them. We all have those days when we look at our children and ask God how we got so lucky to have been given such an amazing child. Then there are the days where we don’t think about either one of those things. 

You hear on the news about horrible things happening to children and for that moment, you appreciate yours just a little bit more. Even may hug them a little tighter that night. 
We take our children for granted most of the time. I think most of us always have it in the back of our minds that those bad things won’t happen to our children. On any day at any moment, it can and will. 
Today was our day. 
One of our kiddos went missing after school. No one could find him. His teachers started looking in every unlocked room in the school. Looked all over the playground. He wasn’t there. One of his teachers even got in her car and went driving around looking for him. Time was ticking and the staff thought that the police needed to be called in order to help look for him. She printed off his yearbook picture along with our phone numbers, the schools number, and a description of what he was wearing today. Mister was on his way up to the school when he found out the police were getting involved. While all this was going on two of our friends where helping. One was helping to look around the school and the other went to our house to look for him. Once the officer arrived he collected the fliers and waited for mister to arrive. While we were waiting my friend pulled up with our kiddo in her car, she had found him! Thank God for her and for finding him! Our kiddo didn’t see me right away after school and decided to walk home. This is unlike him so I didn’t think that’s what happened. He was safe so the details didn’t matter to me. 
There will be days when he will still drive me up the wall and I’ll want to hang him by his toes. There will be days where I’ll still take him for granted. I will try my best to not take any of my kiddos for granted anymore. This had to have been one of the scariest moments of my life. Not knowing where my child was, who had him, and what was happening to him. Those thoughts take a mind of their own when something like this happens. Make an effort to back up and chill. Look at your child and just be thankful. That child could be taken from you at any moment….and it doesn’t matter how good of a parent you think you are. Love those kiddos more today than you did yesterday. Put down those walls and love them like there is no tomorrow.

Written on 10/16/15

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Who am I?

Well, this can/is a hard question to answer. I had a friend on Facebook post who she was. Take her or leave her kinda thing. I imagined she felt freer after she posted it. Maybe those in her life found out things they didn’t know. Loved her more for putting herself out there. I’m not exactly sure why but ever since I read her post, I wanted to do the same. Lay myself out there. Not one person knows all of me. This post won’t allow you to see all of me but it’ll give you more than you probably already know. I have no idea why I feel the need to share any of this with you, but when I am told to do something, I suck it up and listen. I might add that I don’t listen immediately but I try to follow Him and His nudges. 

I can tell you my name. I can tell you what I do. I don’t necessarily think those things define who I am. 

My name is Trel. 

I am a mother, daughter, wife, aunt, daughter in law, granddaughter, friend, sister, step sister, step daughter, niece. 

I clean dishes, wash clothes, wash dishes, heal boo-boos, read stories, play games, listen to problems, fix problems, play dress-up, color, cook meals, and much more. 

But who am I? What do I like? What are my passions? Weakness? Strength? What makes me laugh? Makes me angry? Calms me? What do I believe? Who do I believe in?

I may not know 100% what all these answers are or have more than a few answers, but I do know one thing about myself. I’m complicated. I don’t always understand why I do/feel/think what I do. 

Here are things that I do know about myself:

I love with all I have. I’m a jealous person. I forgive when others tell me I deserve not too. I anger easily. I laugh at inappropriate times. I am inappropriate. I hold back when I should give all. I can be rough. I hurt others. I miss those not in my life deeply. I don’t so well with change. I shove my sadness and frustration down until I just explode. I can tell you all day long how to do something or how to handle a situation but I cannot always practice what I preach. I have the mouth of a sailor most days. I regret. I love to help people. I crave being with my friends and mister. I don’t appreciate what I have. I take my bubble for granted. I suck at admitting I’m wrong. Even harder for me to say I’m sorry. I get clingy but hold back. I start to question things when my friendships reach a certain point. I would do more if I had more to give. I need a partner, I am not good being a leader by myself. I fail daily. I believe in God. I am a Christ follower. I believe what the Bible says. I believe that there is only one way to heaven. I believe everyone has the free will to choose what they believe. My actions/words do not always match my beliefs. When I’m hurting, you probably wouldn’t even know it. I’m good at putting on a smile. I’m a horrible liar, my face will tell on me. I cannot eat/drink something I do not like. No matter how full my life/plate is, I want to help others. I take tons of notes that I, usually, never look at again. My anxiety is ridiculous. Organization calms me. But you wouldn’t know it with the way my house looks. My children have taught me more than I could have ever imagined. I am slapped in the face daily by them…not always a bad thing. I fail them daily. I hope I don’t have to pay for therapy in their future. They make me become more filter less. More courageous. They have made myself build a stronger backbone. My nonsense meter is very low. I have no room for drama in my life…my children’s drama is enough. I am ungrateful. My thanks aren’t enough.  I am forgiven. My mistakes don’t outweigh my worth. Tomorrow is always a new day. The next week/day/hour/minute is another chance for me to be better. I am the least perfect and put together person you will meet. I am a mess. I don’t have all the answers….though my life would be easier if I did. I’m not proud of my past but it’s part of my story. I won’t know what I have until it’s gone though I pray I don’t wait that long to ‘get it’. I trust too quickly but not as quickly as I used to. I’m nice to everyone but I don’t like everyone. If you could hear my inner voice and the goings on of my brain, you would be frightened. I am crazy. I think too much. I like to but if put in a corner, I will fight to the death. I’m impatient. I have to check myself before I wreck myself….daily. I am messy. I talk a hundred miles a minute. I get depressed. I have high highs. I am just a mess trying to do my best and please God. I eat too much. I am so thankful I’m not allergic to chocolate. 

This is me (and more than what I can verbally say). Take me or leave me. I’m not here to please you or make you happy. I don’t apologize for who I am but I am working on making me better. There is always more of me you don’t know or understand (I don’t even understand most days). 

This is me. Trel. 

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Summer funness!

Summer break just started for us and I don’t want to sit around the house for 3 months with 6 kiddos doing nothing and hearing ‘I’m bored!’ ‘What are we going to do?’

I saw someone else do the same thing but I cannot remember where I saw it or who posted it. I thought it was such a smart thing to do that I had to copy it!

I got my 4 oldest kiddos together and asked them what they wanted to do this summer and created their summer bucket list! It’s nothing fancy or glamorous but it works for us. I divided the poster into 4 parts, one for each kiddo, and then wrote down their lists. The color it’s written in matches the color that their chore charts are written in. Figured that was the easiest thing to do so there were no questions. 

  
I haven’t figured out a way for them to check off the things they’ve done. I guess I could let them each decide since it is their list. 

At the end of summer, I’ll come back here and update you on how it worked and if it’s something we’ll do next summer!

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I think I’m a genius 

*cough cough* Excuse me while I wipe away the dust that has settled on the blog! 😜

So it’s true, pretty sure I just became a genius this morning! 

A grabbed a notebook from the stash we have and began to meal plan (it’s been months since I did that!) yesterday. This morning I wrote out the grocery list for those meals.

This is where the genius happened!

I was texting with my friend about a the MOPS exercise group that we want to start. I grabbed my MOPS notebook and started writing down our ideas and plans. Then I grabbed my notebook stated above and began to write out my week. Then I thought I should go ahead and plan out 2 weeks. Then I thought, no I should do all of June. No, I’ll just do all summer! Then I went ahead and wrote out, in 2 week chunks, our meal plans for the whole summer. I haven’t filled in the meals yet but I’ll get to that part. 

I like cutesy, girly, glittery things. I was going to just use paper clips but that didn’t satisfy my want. I decided to use some duct tape that we have and use them as tabs. Again with the genius part! 

I’m glad that I have 3 months of summer to use this and put it in place. Hopefully by the time next school year starts, it’ll be second nature and working great!

My monthly planner I use is my life! If I lost it, I would be lost….we are very close! It’s color coded for everything going on and who it involves. My MP sidekick is not color coded. I don’t color for this. My MP sidekick is just for me to put my to do list, laundry schedule, and anything going on that day. MP sidekick is where I can write more details without over-crowding my planner. These two planners will become best friends and never leave my side! 

I hope and wish so badly that this new tool works. I’m planning everything two weeks out. So each week I’m planning but it’s far enough in advance that I’m not rushing or overwhelming myself. If it works then I plan on getting another notebook for next year that will go along with my planner again. I’ll have to write things out earlier any get my pages organized better at that time. But for now it’ll work and note the changes I need to make for next time. 

I’m overly excited about this and couldn’t wait to share it with you! I’ve been thinking and praying about something that would help me with my time management (cause I’m horrible with it) and I hope this is the answer! 

   
These are my meals planned out for two weeks. 

My grocery list is only for one week. This way I’m not throwing money away because food went bad before I could use it.   

  

This is my days planned out with more detail than my planner. 

 

The friendship begins 😍

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#365daysofthanks – 2/365

Today is January 2nd.

I was actually struggling to find something to be thankful for all day. It just wasn’t a very good day here in our house. We had moments but overall, I’m glad it’s bed time.

I was originally going to say that I was thankful for the rain we are getting today. We live in Texas and are currently in a severe drought, stage 5 to be exact. So when we get rain, everyone is thanking God for it.

Then I got to thinking that I really needed to look for something that might not be so obvious, something that wasn’t right in my face.

Everyone had had gone to bed and it was close to 9pm and still hadn’t found something to write about. And then I was playing with Emma, just her and I. And I looked in her eyes and thought, man am I so thankful for you!

(In case you are new or don’t remember, as I didn’t and had to go back and read it, here are my thoughts when I finding out I was pregnant with our 6th child)

I wasn’t always so excited that this baby would be here. I didn’t want this baby to be here. now when I look at her, I can’t imagine my life without her. She is only 5 months old and it feels like she’s been much longer than that and other times it feels like she just got here. The majority of the time (when I have those moments to reflect) it feels like she was always supposed to be here. And I know that she was in His plans the whole time. I love her so much it hurts sometimes. I cherish her a bit more than my other babies because I feel like she is my last baby. I probably won’t have these moments again. I know that I need to soak them up as much as I can.

I am so thankful for this baby that I cried about when I found out that I was pregnant with her and wished that God would give her to someone else (true story. I even told God who I wanted him to give my baby to). I am so glad He didn’t listen to  me. I’m so glad that He gave her to me. Emma will always be my baby and be my own personal proof that His plans are always better than mine.

 

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#365daysofthanks – 1/365

Today is January 1st, 2015. The first day (technically night as of right now) of a brand new year. Today starts 365 days of me saying what I’m thankful for for an entire year. I’m really hoping to complete this. I’ve started things before but have never finished it. I want to complete this! (Here is my original post of where this started)

Today I am thankful that I have started reading to my kiddos every night. We started on the first book of a series that no one had read before. We are now on book 4. Not only do I look forward to this time with them, my kiddos do also. My two year old will ask throughout the day “read?” I love that they are enjoying this.

I picked up about 3 books each for the kiddos at the library and told them that when they wanted to read them to do so. They’ve actually been doing it! I help B & C read their books and read Lily her books. I absolutely love reading and books! I have yet to have any interest in getting a nook or kindle. I love having a book in my hand. To turn the pages. To smell the pages of a new book. Those are things that I cannot get from a piece of plastic.

I am just thankful to have this time with them every night and that they are enjoying it as much as I am.