Wordless Wednesday 06/12/13



Throwback Thursday 06/06/13


This was taken the day after my baby girl was born last year. I cannot believe it’s been a year already!


When tragedy strikes – a different perspective

I am sure that many bloggers have made posts about what happened in Moore, OK & that others have taken the opportunity to talk about things related to what happened here.
I feel compelled to type this out. I know it’s after the ‘boom’ of what has happened but I needed to take a few days to think about my words (which probably won’t be told the way that I want) and how I was going to express these thoughts/feelings that I have when tragedy’s happen. It’s the same feelings that I have when there is a shooter/bombing/anything that happens in this great country.
This is coming from a point of view that hasn’t experienced something on this level. I was going to high school right outside of DC when 9/11 happened but I didn’t know anyone who was personally effected by the plane crashes. This post is coming from a person who is seeing these events from the outside. I hope/pray that others can relate as well as the victims know that we want to help, no matter where we are.

My heart immediately breaks for those who have to suffer any loss at the hands of someone else. Who looses their home because nature is unpredictable. Who looses a loved one because this life is uncertain.
It’s never fair.
It’s never easy.
Pictures & videos don’t do justice to what you all are feeling/seeing/touching/hearing during these events.
No one can ever imagine what you go through except those who have gone through it before you.

After I see/hear about something that has happened, I immediately want to get up and do something to help. Most of the time there isn’t anything that I can do for different reasons. And knowing/feeling that sucks. Big time.
I want to rush to ground zero and help in anyway that I can. I want to hold children & let them know it will be ok. I want to hug those who are hurting & crying. I want to be the rock during their storm.

I also know that these wants just aren’t possible. I can’t be those things to people who are miles and miles away from me. I cannot be everything I want to be to everyone. I cannot make these people want me to be there.

What I can do at those very moments is pray. Pray for comfort, wisdom, healing, and other things.
I know that some people don’t believe in pray or the power of pray. I am telling you right now that pray is so much more powerful than I could ever explain to you.
Pray is all some people can give.

Know that my heart breaks for every single person that has passed away because of these events.
My heart breaks for the people that have lost their homes & everything inside.
I know all of that is just stuff. I know that stuff can be replaced.
Knowing those facts doesn’t always make getting through the tough times any easier.

I can only watch so much footage before it’s just too much for me. I can only read so much.
After awhile, it just hurts my heart too much to take in anymore.
And, in a way, it’s completely unfair because those going through this don’t have that option.
I can turn the channel, change the radio station, go to the next video on Youtube, keep scrolling through my FB news feed & not have to deal with the heartache.
Not everyone is so lucky to do that.
I am truly sorry that you cannot press stop/pause when something horrible happens.
It’s not fair.
It’s not easy.

It’s getting harder to find the right words that I would like to say/express before I start repeating myself.

Please know that there are people out there that are praying and do care about you, even though we have no idea who each other are.
Please know that there are people out there who’s hearts are breaking for the things that you are having to go through.
Please know that there are people out there who care so much about y’all that they are/would drop everything they have/are doing to help you.

I pray that no matter what you are going through (big or small) that you know people love, care, and pray for you.
You aren’t alone. If you feel that way then someone/thing is lying to you.
Use the recourses’ that they have out there to help you. Don’t feel ashamed either.

I hope/pray that my words came out right and that I didn’t fumble too much over them. ūüėČ

My thoughts & prayers are still with Moore, OK. They will be for some time.
Pictures are burned into my memory from many other tragedy’s that have happened over time. I continue to pray for you.
Just because the media is gone, doesn’t mean that you’re forgotten by people.

Love & prayers for anyone reading this.
Sleep well & be thankful for this moment.
It’s not going to happen again.



Thankful Tuesday – 05/21/13

(Typed this out Tuesday night but it’s not being published until Wednesday morning)

On this night, I am so very thankful that the house that I am currently living in is in once piece & that my little family is all tucked into their beds and sleeping.

I know that with the recent OK events, that not everyone is able to say that. It’s times like these that make you stop & look around at what you have instead of what you don’t. It saddens me that these moments (not the tragedy) don’t happen more often. It shouldn’t take something like a nasty tornado for us to remember this.

As clich√© as this might sound, here goes. Hug your loved ones. There’s no such thing as saying “I love you” too much. Smile more often. And thank the good Lord above for what you have around you right at this moment. Things can always be worse than your moment right now.

Love you all & pray that you are safe and sound tonight. ūüôā ‚̧


Bears for Angel Babies

I have talked about this topic a few times but not very often. I don’t know what it’s like to go through something like this because it’s never happened to me. I am so thankful that it hasn’t but at the same time my breaks over & over again for the friends/family that have gone through this.¬†This has¬†been a thought that comes to my mind when I hear about a family/couple going through this…..I sometimes ask why haven’t I¬†expereinced this? Why must I always say just “I’m sorry”. I truly that when I say it. These women hear that sentence all the time though & I am sure they get tired of hearing it & when some people say it, their words could just empty.
I always like to stay positive about things/life. I try and find encouraging words to pass along to those that come to me during hard times. I feel honored when friends/family come to me during their hard times. This hard time leaves me speechless and I have no idea what to say to these women. My heart aches for them so much but I can never put those feelings into words. Nothing I say is going to make it better or make it easier. I so hate hearing when this happens. I just want to hug the lady so badly when I hear about this.

I want to share a dear/good friend of mines story. It’s still very fresh with her but she is wanting to get her story out. Her & I have talked about it and she feels like women need to share their story rather than leave it to yourself. I completely agree! We all have stories to share. We cannot help others who go through the same thing if we do not take that first step and share. I am not saying that you need to share right away. Once you feel ok/comfortable talking about this, then I think you need to share with anyone that will listen. You shouldn’t have to hide your true feelings. It doesn’t matter if it makes someone else uncomfortable, share anyway. If they don’t want to hear it, then they can walk away. Share your story because you never know who needs to hear it at that exact moment. I hope by sharing Nicole’s story it reaches someone who needs it. I pray that more of you ladies speak up & share. I pray that you find comfort & healing with sharing your stories. You story matters.

Hello all Mommie Ventures readers!.  Before I start writing about what I want to write about, I want to thank Trel for giving me the opportunity to write to all of you about this!

I decided to tell you about this by giving you a little about me and my situation first.¬† I recently lost twins.¬† I lost the first one on 4/27/13.¬† After I lost that baby, I immediately had a sonogram.¬† I will never forget the hope that day brought me because what I found out that day was that I was having twins.¬† I saw my second baby and his/her heartbeat!¬† It was a wonderful 120 beats per minute and the baby was measuring great.¬† Even my midwife was filled with hope.¬† Two days later, the contractions started and on 4/29/13 my second baby was born to heaven.¬† I was devastated.¬† I didn’t know what to do with myself, I didn’t know how I was going to continue living knowing that my body turned me down that hard until I joined a support group on Facebook.¬† I realized something then, when you have a full term, healthy baby there is one thing you always get and that is a special present from your loved ones.¬† They all bring you and/or the baby something.¬† A balloon, flowers, and bears.¬† Well, when you loose¬†your babies, you are brought¬†nothing.¬† You are left with not even a baby to hold.¬† You are only left with a positive pregnancy test and sometimes a sonogram.¬† The one thing you get is, ‚ÄúI am so sorry.‚Ä̬† I needed to change that.

And so, with that said, Bears for Angel Babies was born!¬† Bears for Angel Babies is a new charity that is dedicated¬†to giving as many Angel Babies the gift they didn’t get when they were born to heaven, a handmade bear free of charge.¬† I opened the Facebook page on 5/1/13 and gained about 80 likers¬†and 26 heart filled requests for bears in the matter of hours!¬† And since then, me and my fellow crocheters¬†have sent out a total of 11 bears already but the orders keep coming!¬† I was so excited, but now I am just overwhelmed too.¬† I could really use some extra support.¬† I am hoping to bring in more crocheters¬†that are open to help make some bears.¬† I also really need more monetary support to be able to keep this page going.¬† Other things that could really be helpful are yarn, patterns, and even coupons.¬† I am hoping that as the page grows there will be more and more help, but right now I am asking you to help make a difference.¬† You can donate to Bears for Angel Babies by sending a donation by clicking on this link:¬† If you would like to crochet, donate yarn, or donate coupons you can email me at to get directions or a mailing address.¬†

I want to thank each and every one of you for reading this and at least giving Bears for Angel Babies a thought for a wonderful charity to donate to.  If you would like to see the good will being done or would just like more information, you can check us out on Facebook at  Thank you again!

I also want to give a shout out to some lovely women who helped me right from the beginning.  Special thanks and a special place in my heart to: Stacy Krumel-Rhoads, Jennifer Forsberg, Bethany Wallen, Crystal Fink, Savanah Songer, Lori Luh, Carolyn Strough, Donna Neubeck, Sumi Funayama, Chelsea Ayers, Abby Haritos, Jeanette Burnett, Trel Welker and Sarah Fisher.  You all are amazing ladies and thank you so much for helping make the bears, donating when you can, and being an amazing support!

If you have questions, comments, or would like to share your story, please reach out to someone. Someone will always be there to help, support, and care about you & your babies.


10 outta 12

My goodness, it’s that time again to give an update on Miss Lily!
She turned 10 months on Sunday. I cannot believe she is already 10 months!!
I know I say that every month but it’s so true!

You never know how quickly a month goes by until you have a baby!

She is speaking jibberish and can’t wait for her to say Momma!
She finally has two bottom teeth coming through! One has already broken through and you can see the other one right under the skin.
She is climbing up on things, mostly Papa! She can open drawers and take things out…which only means trouble!
She is loving food!! We share with her and having come across a food that she doesn’t like!
She stands by herself but hasn’t taken any steps yet. Her older siblings are trying to help her out an holding her hands and walking with her.

We are still breastfeeding(!), cloth diapering, baby wearing, and co-sleeping.

I’m most excited about the breastfeeding! I haven’t been able to go past a few weeks with my other 4 and here I am at our 10 month mark!!

I’ve tried to have Lily sleep in her crib right next to our bed and not because I want to….my back hurts a lot in the morning. I love snuggling with her at night and each morning!!! I’ve tried letting her cry it out, getting her to sleep and then putting her in her crib, and sitting with her while she’s in her crib…..I just can’t do it. It breaks my heart too much and she looks so scared when I go in and get her. I don’t want her to be scared. And y’all can’t tell me anything that would make me change my mind. I may have to deal with her being 3 and coming in my bed at night but at least then I can talk to her and try and explain things to her. I cannot do that now.
My other kiddos weren’t like this and were already sleeping in their own bed and room right now. This part is new to me.
You may think that I need to be harder with her but that look on her face is something that I cannot justify leaving her alone to cry it out.

See ya next month!!!
PS- Already started planning her 1st birthday!!!


10 minus 1

My first baby is now 9 years old!!!! How could it possibly time for another one o his birthdays?!

He was my first baby, the one that started this journey called motherhood. Boy have we been through and learned a lot these past 9 years.

He is growing up too fast but becoming a wonderful young man at the same time. I’m so proud of him an cannot wait to see what else his life has in store!

Happy birthday Mark, Mommie loves you very much!!!



I still remember the day he was born, who was there, an my feelings/thoughts. It just seems like yesterday that he was born…so new, so tiny. If for one more day he could be that tiny again for me to cuddle with.


Here he is this morning eating his breakfast. I’m speechless at the thought that I have been his mom, and a mom period, for 9 years!
I would change so much if I could go back in time knowing what I know now. But since I can’t, I will do my best from what I have learned from this day forward. That’s all I can do really.

Love you bud!!!!