Words

Words are so powerful.

They can make you happy, sad, scared, worried, excited, surprised, angry, betrayed, loved, supported, used, wanted…….so many emotions can come from the words you say.

I believe that words are much more powerful than any action you could ever do. Wounds can heal & scars can fade but you never forget the words someone says to you.

You can use words to metaphorically wrap a warm blanket around someone or slap someone in the face.

You can use words to tell the truth….or tell a lie.

You can use words to get your point across harshly or to get your point across without being harsh.

You can use your words to spread love. Or to spread hate.

There is so much that words can do….the list could go on and on and on…..

When you use words, you should always think before you speak. You cannot erase then words that come out of your mouth & there is no mind eraser to make those you spewed those words to disappear.

I am not a fan of people speaking for me, taking my words and twisting them, or putting words into my mouth that I never said. When someone does this to me I never know how the other person is going to react, there is so much investigating that has to go on, and even more repair that I have to do. There have been times that when someone did one of those three things that it hasn’t ended well. More times than not I can explain what this 3rd person said (usually this 3rd person was wrong and\or assumed things).

I don’t know about you all but I always feel like I need to explain myself when someone does one (or more) of those three things to me. Not feeling like I need to explain to hide anything, but to reassure the person that I wouldn’t say those things and that’s not how they would find out even if I did say those things. I do NOT like to see my friends & they people I care about be upset at me for something someone else said. I don’t like knowing where our friendship stands after something like this happens. I don’t like knowing that someone thinks it’s ok to do one (or more) of these three things to me. I would never say something behind someone’s back that I wouldn’t say to their face. I would rather someone say something to my face rather than behind my back. I would much rather have my feelings hurt because you were honest with me than my feelings not hurt because you lied to me. Now, this is just me and everyone is different. but I would think that most people would feel the same way.

Something happened today with a friend of mine where someone told them I said something about them and I did not! Now I am not sure where our friendship stands and it is making me very uneasy. I really enjoy spending time with this person, talking with this person, and just being around this person. I don’t always agree with this persons beliefs, actions, and\or words but (in my opinion) it’s not my job to make this person think my way. It’s my job to love this person where they are and just enjoy them. I don’t have to agree with someone to be friends with them. I don’t want friends that agree with me all the time…that would get too boring.

I am not sure if this person will read this post or not but I am going to say this anyway in hopes that this person will. I did not say those things about you. If I even agreed somewhat (which I disagree with completely) with what this person said I said, I wouldn’t be your friend. I wouldn’t have sat with you and opened up to you like I did the other night. I wouldn’t want to be around you. I wouldn’t be hurting because this happened. I hope that we can talk about this soon, get things straightened out, and grow deeper in our friendship. Know that I care about you, I am not taking sides, and that (honestly) I am growing to love you as a great friend. I have no idea where I stand with you and how you feel about me after this happened, but I really do hope that you talk to me about this so I can clear the air and dismiss anything else this person said that I told them. Love you and hope our friendship grows deeper instead of further apart.

People, please watch what you say when speaking for others. If you think someone needs to know something that another person said, tell them to go ask that person about it….don’t speak for anyone, it just gets people in trouble and can destroy friendships. The only person you should speak for is yourself and that’s it!

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One thought on “Words

  1. My dear loving Daughter Trel;
    How I share a lifetime of your words. Our World suffers from the pain others bring by their perceptions. Ever see the words used to describe Jews during the Holocaust. It is written that words can murder a person. I know that is true because it has happen to me. The words a person said to me caused me to die; I no longer exist in their lives. The saying: sticks n stones will break my bones but names can never hurt me” is a lie. More recent we have seen the teen suicides because of hate filled blogging.
    The whole focus of how to live and to be happy is to use the pain to work through to see the correction to connection so as to rise above the hate and love. This internal and we can only do it within our self. We can not cause others to do it at all. This is not easy when hateful words divide families and friendships. Or physical beatings maim and disable a person. We have technology and ways to heal and cure the body. We even have knowledge on how to help emotional, mentally challenged live healthy happier lives.
    YET WE STILL hate and do things that hurt. Society, social interaction, community life and interpersonal relationships still have not changed.
    Forgive me for sharing this video: I hope it can help some one who is hurting to work through the pain & love again by seeing the correction to connections. Separation & distance between people does not have to be done in a negative manner. When loving & positive has so much more to give over the miles.
    I love you Trel and all that you do for your family, your husband, your children, those who read this blog, your community. All your effort & work makes me feel loved and I have joy.
    http://perceivingreality.com/

I look forward to your comments & try to reply to every single one of them :)

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